How to Pick a Destination Wedding Venue Without Visiting in Person!

Sep 2

Booking a wedding venue in a different country without even seeing it in person first is kind of nerve wracking. Would you believe I've done it successfully for weddings in 12 countries? As a destination wedding planner, I even booked my own wedding sight unseen in Greece!

So, I'm going to share my tips to get you feeling confident to be able to book your wedding venue abroad from a wedding Tuscany to Lake Garda; from the Amalfi Coast to a Portugal destination wedding; a wedding in Santorini to Spain and beyond, without visiting it in person first.

First of all, why would you ever book a wedding venue without visiting in person first? Is that even a responsible thing to do? Well, yes, and I even recommend it to my couples. However, you have to go about it in the right way in order to book a venue you truly love and avoid having destination wedding regrets or venue buyers’ remorse. There are several reasons why you might need to book your wedding venue internationally without visiting in person. The first reason is URGENCY.

If you are at home planning your destination wedding and you absolutely fall in love with your dream venue: price is right, it's available for the date that you want, all you need to do is go visit it in person to feel good about it. By the time you book that trip, you fly over there and you see it, that calendar of availability they originally gave you is going to be completely changed. The delay that visiting in person causes could be the difference between getting married in the year that you want or having to push it back an additional year

The second huge reason why couples book wedding venues for their destination wedding site unseen is MONEY.

It's expensive to plan a wedding venue shopping trip - that is a luxury. It then also puts a lot of pressure on that trip if you actually do go over there and see the venue, for you to then actually pick it because of all the money you spent going to see it. For couples who are trying to have a dream destination wedding while keeping their costs as low as possible, spending thousands to go visit the venue beforehand just isn't worth it.

So the reality is, if you want to book a destination wedding by saving thousands (because you're not going on a trip to visit it) and also do it quickly (and get the date that you want), you will have to book it without visiting in person.

So how do you plan a destination wedding without visiting the venue first? I have a technique that will allow you to cover your bases without even leaving the comfort of your own home simply by using the five senses, sight, smell, sound, taste, touch.

Sight
Let's start with sight. This might sound obvious, but with sight, we need to see it, so we're going to see it virtually and we're going to have a virtual site visit. Once you've established a contact at the venue that you're emailing with, ask them to have a video call where they can put you on their phone and walk you around their property. That could be on Zoom, WhatsApp video, FaceTime, or even Skype. That way you're able to actually walk around the property with them and have a guided tour without physically being there. Couple things to note, not all venues do this. Most will, but not all venues will accommodate this and it will be harder to book if it's the middle of their busy season. So just be patient with them about when they can schedule that.
Another thing to be aware of when you do a video call with them is to be prepared to wake up early, especially if you're in the States and you're getting married in Europe. Depending on your time zone, you might be getting up at 6:00 AM to do this. You might even be getting up at 5:00 AM to do this! Try to be super flexible because these appointments are hard to get and we want to make sure you can get one as soon as possible during the call.
If it's possible, ask them to tour in order of the experience on the wedding day, so the ceremony, then the cocktail hour space, then the dinner space, then the dancing space, and then if there's an after party space for example. That's going to help you piece together the flow of events. You're also going to want to make sure they show you the rain plan and backup locations as well to make sure you like those because you can't change that. Seeing it in this format too is going to help you piece together the scale of the property that might otherwise be really hard to comprehend just based on their photos or their brochure. Also, if you're touring on a random Tuesday and it's not all gussied up and dressed up with wedding decor, you're seeing it in its real state, not hidden by the glitz and the glam and the editing of a professional brochure.
This call is also a bonus time to get to know your venue coordinator. This person who is taking you around the property who works there is going to be there on your wedding day, and it's going to be the person you're talking to throughout your wedding planning process. So feel out their personality, understand if there's any language barrier or challenge with communicating across cultures, and make sure that you feel totally at ease that this is going to be your point person.
Smell
Our next sense is smell. This is something you cannot pick up by not visiting in person. So how do we get over that? For example, if your venue is downwind from the sewer treatment plant (or DOWISETREPLA from my HIMYM fans), and when the wind is just right, a terrible smell blows through your venue. They're not going to tell you that on the virtual call because why would they? So we need to use context clues.
Look at a map. Are there any farms nearby? Are there any dumps nearby? You can also leverage reviews from past couples because they will mention that, and you can even reach out to those couples and say, Hey, how was your experience?
I also think in this case it makes sense to reach out to past vendors. You can find photographers or videographers who might be willing to talk to you just by going to that venue's Instagram page. Click on their tagged section and see what photographers have tagged the venue in their photos. That photographer has stood at that venue, boots on the ground. You can send 'em a quick DM and simply say, “Hey, I'm really excited about this venue. I saw you've worked there before. I can't visit in person. Are there any red flags I should know about?”
Sound
The next sense is sound and you can using today's technology, pick this up during your video walkthrough.
We need to look specifically at your ceremony location. Otherwise, music's going to be playing throughout your event so it doesn't really matter if there's anything loud happening, but during your ceremony, we do want a calm, peaceful, quiet space, especially if you're going to be outside. So ask them to stand in the ceremony space. Take a beat if you hear loud water features like fountains or a waterfall or farm equipment or a highway. You can also use Google satellite to see if there are any major roads near your ceremony location. Those are all great questions to ask while you're standing in that space. For example, “Does that water feature turn off?” or “Hey, how loud are the cars from the highway, realistically, when a ceremony is happening?”
Touch
The next sense is touch.
Now, I don't mean that we need to feel the stone of the building. I'm talking about the temperature, the comfort level, the coziness of the bed, all those things that your guests are going to be experiencing while they're there for your wedding.
When you're talking about temperature, the best person in the world to ask about the realistic temperature at your wedding venue is the person that works there every day. So while you're on that video call, say, “Hey, I want to get married in April. Tell me what is it usually like? Is it cold? Is it rainy? Is it windy? What do I need to know?”
For things like guest comfort and bed comfort, those are common things that people talk about in reviews. So if your venue has accommodations attached to it and you want to understand the comfort level of the room, I would go to TripAdvisor because chances are they're going to have reviews of the rooms themselves. Whether they're a functioning hotel or just other guests that have stayed there as a part of a wedding.

5. Taste

And our fifth sense: taste.

Taste is important because a lot of times your venue is going to be the sole provider of the food for your wedding. So by choosing a venue, you're not only locking in where you're getting married, you're also locking in the caterer at the same time. However, it's really hard to know if you're picking a quality caterer if you can't taste the food first. So to bridge the gap of not being able to taste the food before choosing the venue, I always recommend that we ask for photos of their most popular dishes. This will give you an idea of a few things, their portion size, the specific dishes that they're really good at, and what previous couples have been loving and selecting for their wedding menu. Again, if you're already talking to people who have had their wedding there at that venue, you can ask them what their experience was like with the food as well, and try not to stress out too much about it. I know a lot of people say, “Kay, I really want good food!” But we have to put it in context here. If there's something on the menu that people didn't like in the past or something that you're worried about them executing properly, don't put it on your wedding menu. This is also why asking for the previous favorites is really important because then you can pull those types of proteins or those types of dishes into your wedding menu and know that they're going to be a surefire thing.

So that is the process to use the five senses to vet a wedding venue from the comfort of your own home without spending thousands on visiting all while expediting the venue booking process. For some inspiration, check out my list of cheapest wedding venues in Tuscany! If you're in the venue research phase right now for a wedding in Europe or Mexico and you're comparing all of these options, I highly recommend that you do a budget exercise before choosing the one for you.

To do that, you can download my guide to estimate the cost of your destination wedding before booking a venue. Get the guide below!